Stages of a twin flame relationship vary by source by let me tell you, people often leave out the most important final step... expansion.

I am one of the few twin flame experts that will tell you twins aren't meant to stay together. Well most of them anyway. I would say up to 90% of them won't end up in happy, healthy marriages.

Almost all the emails I get and comments I see are people struggling to even get their twin flame to commit to them, leave their marriage, or even get them to respond to a text. It's super painful and no one is talking about this. They all want to talk about improving yourself so your twin will want to reunite. Bleh. It's so powerless.

So here are the real twin flame stages.

Stages of a Twin Flame Relationship:

1. Intense meeting/portal opens- coming together. Will feel an instant connection, chemistry, and love. Both feel incredible healing energy from the portal that was opened from meeting their twin. About 10 to 20% instant healing and upleveling just from interacting and allowing in the twin. First taste of that twin flame crack! haha. The energy coming out of the portal feels like home, connectedness, pure love and perfect.

2. Runner-Chaser - back and forth, push and pull, disappear and reappear, hide and seek. You know this stage well. The runner feels completely overwhelmed by the emotions and feels out of control. The runner chooses to lean out and away. Runner is pulled back in occasionally. Chaser wants to dive in and feels a strong pull to bring the runner closer. Chaser comes up with theories on why the runner runs and develops their own treatment plan for their runner. haha

3. Crisis Stage – There is a realization that the relationship has become toxic or the other partner is not coming around anymore. Time of great pain. Expect: Obsessive thoughts, desperate texts, crying, physical stress symptoms, struggling at work, etc. Feelings of despair, loneliness, hopelessness, suicidal thoughts, etc. Hours spent online researching twin flames. Going from hope to despair frequently. Looking to make reunion happen at any cost. Reaching out to psychics for confirmation.

Pain leads to growth. This is the time to go inward. Use the pain for growth. Somatic work, inner child work, spiritual gift development, therapy, coaching, hypnosis, etc is the only way out of the pain.

4. Surrender- Chaser realizes their controlling, codependent, and chasing ways don’t help the situation. Chaser becomes enlightened on the situation (frantically googling til coming across twin flame concept). Runner is allowed to run and then becomes enlightened that they want to be with other person. Space helped them fight their demons or let them handle things they need to handle. We can not control if the runner finds surrender. We can’t know if it’s for their highest good to heal now or to continue living in pain.

5. Reunion (two ways!) – 1. Actual reunion: Both parties have learned their core lessons (on their own and while with their partner). They are ready to learn relationship skills to add to your already deep love and spiritual connection. 2. Internal reunion only. There is no guarantee to come back together in this lifetime. You may realize this person will never be able to be with you. They are addict, married, scared, unwilling to move, too busy, too something. They love you but can't be with you. This is when you find all the parts of you that were scattered and disconnected. You feel connected and loved inside of you, all because your twin left you.

Reunion is not guaranteed and is not the goal!

Reunion is spirit’s business. Not ours. We can’t know if it’s in the world’s highest interest to be with our twin in this lifetime. It may feel like your whole being is telling you this person is coming back, and especially that psychic you paid hundreds of dollars to is going to tell you they are coming back. We have to leave room open in our minds that we don’t know that to be true. Hope blinds us to evidence of who this person really wants to be.

6. Expansion and Creation- This is a phase I am adding to the twin flame literature. I believe most twin flames do NOT end up together. And that is great news! TF are there to help you expand. Not to live happily ever after. No great love story begins with .. oh he was married ... he didn't talk to me for 3 months.... she had a drinking problem.... In fact once I broke up with my twin flame energetically my life launched into this amazing space I could never go with him. You'll find you do all this personal work just so you can have a reunion. Then realize you don't want to get back with this person. You have way surpassed them.

Hope is the dope that keeps us trying with twin flames. Hope is also a way to spiritual bypass and can be a trauma response.

I realized once I stopped projecting qualities on him - like being someone who wants to grow and change, being someone who is happier in love not fear, being someone who can handle more in their life than just chemistry and an intense spiritual connection.. I finally saw him for who he was. and I could love him where he is.. And a huge burden was lifted off my shoulders.

Expansion is guaranteed. You will grow and change from this.

So instead of trying to get your twin flame to text you back, think about how great this is.

You can now find that feeling you get from them within yourself. You have the power. You have the magic. They weren't handing you that feeling of love. You were creating it within.

And that is the point of a twin flame - it's not love, marriage, and baby carriage. It's growth expansion, explosions, realizations, and a boost into your next amazing phase in life.

They lit a spark, and it's your job to run with it. And run without them if they can't hang with you :)

In the end, you must choose yourself over the painful connection.

If it is too painful or you are having a hard time getting to a place of surrender or gratitude, please reach out and let’s do a coaching or hypnosis session. I started doing these because I don’t want anyone to struggle alone like I did years ago.

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